signs of the apocalypse

Ronaldinho goes golden

Associated Press - BARCELONA, Spain
Ronaldinho, the 2004 soccer player of the year and a key member of Brazil's 2002 World Cup champion, will go golden this weekend.

Ronaldinho will wear real gold in his soccer boots in Barcelona's game against Real Zaragoza. Nike has developed a special gold and white version of the shoes Ronaldinho normally wears. It will feature real 24-carat gold applied to the Nike logo.

Previously, Michael Johnson wore a gold track spike in the 2000 Sydney Olympics. Roger Federer and Maria Sharapova wore tennis shoes laced with gold at Wimbledon this year.

The boots feature a gold tongue with an 'R' embroidered in silver color on the right boot -- inspired by the necklace Ronaldinho wears -- and an embroidered No. 10 on the left. The heel is embossed with five gold stars to honor Brazil's five World Cup wins, and the boot also includes a laser-patterned sock liner with the word 'Ronaldinho' on it.

"I can't wait to wear the gold boots against Zaragoza," he said. "We were wondering how to give the boot a personal touch, so they copied the design of my neck chain to reproduce the 'R' and added my number 10. I got the joy of taking part in the design, so they are all mine and personalized."

"baaaaaby rrruuuuf"

This is the stupidist thing that I have ever blogged about. No really, BY FAR! I don't even know how it was broached, but my work "cell mates" and I were cutting up a bit earlier, and I happend to have an unopened Snickers bar on my desk. Anthony, picked it up and said, "230 calories in that thing, wow."

It is at this point that I spouted out, "230 calories in that turd?" Which leads to "I wonder how many calories are in a real turd" and our old friend google.com.

You would not believe the funny stuff that comes up when you search for 'how many calories in a turd'. No really try it, it's fun.

For all those wondering...

"it is likely about 6 calories per gram but it is going to vary depending upon diet. if you eat a lot of fat it will be higher, poop is nothing more than the food you body does not need except in a gross form. So a turd the size of a typical Baby Ruth candy bar (see caddy shack movie) is about 250 calories ."

Well, we found our answer AND as an added bonus we found a great web site. The ever maligned Poop Report.

After just a quick tour, I knew that I had to share this with all that I know and love. With sections as classy as: Intellectual Crap, Fun with Feces & Travel Logs. One cannot go wrong.

Now, go on out and share!

just a small favor to ask...

I'd love to know who is visiting the blog, I see the page hits, but would love to see some more comments too! Thank you, and we'll leave a light on for ya!

- prime mover

The ultimate in madness

I have to give this guy some props. Let's just say that what he has done makes my geekdom pale in comparison...

Now, I'm sure at one time or another we have all played the hollowed game of "rock, paper, scissor". And I am pretty convinced that we have all come up with variations thereof, I know we mutated into "dynamite, tank, machine gun" in the 4th grade. But, this chap has taken it to a whole new level - I'm quite impressed to present to you, the viewing public: RPS-25!

That's right, we now have the capability to throw 1 of 25 gang signs that would make Ralph Macchio himself tapdance. we've gone way past the whole "15 is too many" factor and jumped right to such new and terrifying signs such as the: snake, alien, sponge, nuke and bowl.

15.5 Octillion results - now only a 1 in 13 chance of a tie. We'll never have a life.

Check it out here. And remember you heard it here first kids.

PS) While you are there, check out the signs, some of them are quite funny...

DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just lost my blog post. I spent 20 minutes writing it and accidenatally closed it. FRUSTRATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll try and get back to it later.

Yours in stupidity,
Me

Signs of the apocalypse

Big Easy Like Tuesday Morning

The following letter posted by Chris Rose at The Times-Picayune

---

Dear America,
I suppose we should introduce ourselves: We're South Louisiana. We have arrived on your doorstep on short notice and we apologize for that, but we never were much for waiting around for invitations. We're not much on formalities like that.

And we might be staying around your town for a while, enrolling in your schools and looking for jobs, so we wanted to tell you a few things about us. We know you didn't ask for this and neither did we, so we're just going to have to make the best of it.

First of all, we thank you. For your money, your water, your food, your prayers, your boats and buses and the men and women of your National Guards, fire departments, hospitals and everyone else who has come to our rescue.

We're a fiercely proud and independent people, and we don't cotton much to outside interference, but we're not ashamed to accept help when we need it. And right now, we need it.

Just don't get carried away. For instance, once we get around to fishing again, don't try to tell us what kind of lures work best in your waters.

We're not going to listen. We're stubborn that way.

You probably already know that we talk funny and listen to strange music and eat things you'd probably hire an exterminator to get out of your yard.

We dance even if there's no radio. We drink at funerals. We talk too much and laugh too loud and live too large and, frankly, we're suspicious of others who don't.

But we'll try not to judge you while we're in your town.

Everybody loves their home, we know that. But we love South Louisiana with a ferocity that borders on the pathological. Sometimes we bury our dead in LSU sweatshirts.

Often we don't make sense. You may wonder why, for instance - if we could only carry one small bag of belongings with us on our journey to your state - why in God's name did we bring a pair of shrimp boots? We can't really explain that. It is what it is.

You've probably heard that many of us stayed behind. As bad as it is, many of us cannot fathom a life outside of our border, out in that place we call Elsewhere.

The only way you could understand that is if you have been there, and so many of you have. So you realize that when you strip away all the craziness and bars and parades and music and architecture and all that hooey, really, the best thing about where we come from is us.

We are what made this place a national treasure. We're good people. And don't be afraid to ask us how to pronounce our names. It happens all the time.

When you meet us now and you look into our eyes, you will see the saddest story ever told. Our hearts are broken into a thousand pieces. But don't pity us. We're gonna make it. We're resilient. After all, we've been rooting for the Saints for 35 years. That's got to count for something.

OK, maybe something else you should know is that we make jokes at inappropriate times.

But what the hell.

And one more thing: In our part of the country, we're used to having visitors. It's our way of life.

So when all this is over and we move back home, we will repay to you the hospitality and generosity of spirit you offer to us in this season of our despair.

That is our promise. That is our faith.

"What has been, will be again"

As I look back on the ominous destructor that is now known as Katrina, I cry. I remember my home as it used to be and wonder if it will ever capture the radiance that was New Orleans again. I choose to think that it will. The great Tenessee Williams once said that there are only three great cities in America, New York, San Francisco and New Orleans. My fellow New Orleneans are a strong people, and more importantly a stubborn people. It is that latter that will overcome this unruly hand and build our so dubbed "New" New Orleans. Although the residential parts of St. Bernard, Jefferson and Orleans Parishes are for all intensive purposes going to be bulldozed and rebuilt, our history still is there: The French Quarter, Lee Circle, Most of the Garden District, Loyola, Tulane, Audubon Park, and the Audubon Zoo among others.

For some reason, when this first hit, one of my first anxieties was of the Zoo. It is hands down one of my favorite places on the planet. To be more specific my exact spot is in the nooks of the historic Oak tree that has worked it's way in and out of the earth. If anyone has ever been there, you will know instantly what I mean. This is one of the first places that I remember as a child. As I have grown into adulthood, my return visits home have always brought me back to this spot. Now it has become more than a favorite spot, it has become a symbol to me. Because you see, that tree is now the people of New Orleans, our roots are deep, and we are so interwoven with our "spot" we will never give it up.

Oh yes my friends, New Orleans will be great again, we won't allow it not to be...